If you ask any of my friends, one of the things I'm best known for is my ridiculous stories. It's not just that I'm a gifted story-teller, but I genuinely have the most ridiculous things happen to me on a semi-regular basis. So if the story of how I became a missionary lacked one of those stories, well, we could probably assume that it wasn't actually my life. So here is my crazy story. It's how I got the courage and confidence to turn in my application.
It was mid-October. I had prayed up quite a bit at this point and was fairly certain God was calling me into missions. However I liken myself to Gideon at this point. I even think I recited his story back to God one time when I was praying: "You know God, I remember that guy Gideon of yours. He asked for that silly sign with the fleece and you did it to confirm his calling. You wouldn't mind throwing me a bone like that would you?" And this was one of those prayers although I meant, I didn't really know that God would answer. Because it seems too much to ask a sign of Him, the Almighty God of the Universe.
I was at a retreat at a camp with my college group, Standing in the Gap. We were having an hour of alone time with God. The night before I had really wanted to canoe and almost took a group to the middle of the lake but we couldn't find any paddles in the dark. This desire still burned into me so I decided I'd grab a canoe and meet God "upon the waters" if you will. I paddled all the way across to an island that was at the other side. It was windy and wavy and the journey was hard, but I had this determination. If God wanted me to work, I was going to work for Him. I'd strive, I'd labor as long as I could be close to His heart. Throughout this process, I found myself thinking even though the road to becoming a missionary would be a hard one, it would be worth it as long as I could be close to His heart. At the other side, I stopped. I read a Psalm. Then I decided to head back so I'd be back before the hour was up and people started worrying (since it's so much harder to predict travel time in canoe).
But more than ever, here is where my adventure really started. Remember the wind and the waves? Well, maybe on my way out I should have paid a little more attention to just how windy it was. As I tried to paddle back the wind was so strong, I could make no progress against it. After 20 minutes of relentless paddling, I was about 15 feet from where I started. My arms were already getting close to worn out, because of how hard I had to paddle. And I had about 90% left of the lake to go. Obviously it was time to revise my plan a little.
What I decided next was I would just paddle to the nearest shore. I would need to ditch the canoe but we could always walk around the lake and go back for it. And I would at least be able to follow the lake back to the camp. After a bit of struggling, I got to a dock by the shore. It was at this point I realized I had no rope to tie my canoe up. Okay, time to revise the plan again because I'm not losing a canoe on these people. Nearby I saw a pile of logs scattered in the water. I decided if I jammed the canoe in there it would at least not run away on me. So with my expert canoeing skills, I jammed it.
Unfortunately I was still about 10 feet from shore and I couldn't tell how deep the water was. Nor did I really want to wade in water anyway, since it was October in Michigan. It was then I noticed these weird fungus-y lily pads leading up to the shore. I have never seen something like it before and I doubt I will ever see something like them again. But God was providing for me that day. I stepped on each lily pad and although I sank a little, and sometimes I lost my footing and fell off, I got to shore a lot less wet than I could have been. It was during that ritual God spoke to my heart this message though, "Kacie, you say you want to adventure with me, but you forget something. It's my adventure. I get to define the terms. It won't always be pleasant or easy. But at least, we'll get to be together. But remember my adventure, my terms."
To recap, I was now exhausted from canoeing. I was almost wet up to my waist from wading through the lily pads. In front of me was one of the steepest hills I have ever seen. Seriously it was almost straight up. I had no idea, in my state, how I could ever climb it without just slipping and falling back into the lake. So I walked alongside it for a while, knowing eventually I would have to climb but looking for the ideal spot. All this time I was also having some pretty heavy, inner-dialogue with God going on. I was probably complaining more than I should, but I was also acknowledging how desperate I was for His help even in this next step. And marveling at some of the ways He had provided and lead me this far. It was as I was marveling that I saw quite the sight on the side of that hill. At one part, there were almost 20 fallen trees arranged in a perfectly linear fashion leading up the hill. Just like a staircase. So I went for it. I ran up this staircase and behind me these trees crumbled. I felt like Indiana Jones. But I know that staircase, those trees that had fallen, was something God had put there just to show me how He provides for me. God, the provider, gets another point. Which is good because going into missions one of the biggest things that could have stopped me was not trusting in God's provision.
I now started following the edge of the lake back to camp. From my understanding of lakes, I knew that as long as I followed the edge I wouldn't get lost. But then I hit it. Embedded on the side of the lake, which I couldn't see before, was about a 30 foot channel. There was no way I could cross it. I figured it maybe went just a little into the land and I could go around, but after searching there was no luck with that. So I began to ask God for help again. In my desperation, I started knocking on the doors of houses looking for directions at the very least. But alas, the whole area was filled with summer homes and being mid October, they were out of commission for the season.
Finally I saw them. A little old man and lady raking their yard. Thanking God, I went up to them the cold, shivering, wet pitiful mess I was and asked for directions on how to get to camp. The old man let out a little laugh as he told me it was about 8 miles to get to the bridge that connected the two sides. Eight miles! Thankfully he took one look up and down me before offering a ride. The man and I drove back in his truck. I shared with him my adventure, my predicament, and the things I had been thinking about that afternoon. But more importantly I was able to listen about his grandchildren, his life, his hopes and dreams. That ride became such a blessed part of the adventure. I had not only needed God's help that day, I had needed others to bless me with their generosity and God had put this man there for that purpose. I know the same thing is necessary in my ministry, but this reminds me it's a blessing from God for both of us and I need to allow the body to bless me and look to bless them in return. And something that was especially cool was his wife and him
had only come up that weekend to close up the cabin for the winter. Talk
about God's provision.
I had arrived safely back at camp. And seeing God's provision, His goodness, His faithfulness, and hearing without a shadow of a doubt His call, I knew I was now ready. To trust Him, to trust others, to bless and to be blessed. But most importantly to follow Him wherever He lead, even if that was into missions.
To my friends: Life with God is supposed to be an adventure. It's supposed to be exciting and real...and you're supposed to be in over your head at times. But there's great joy in doing that adventure with God, in following His voice where He calls, and even stepping out into the waters amongst the wind and waves as long as you're with Him. I pray we'd all learn to say as Moses did: "If Your presence does not go with us, do not send us up from here" (Exodus 33:15) and choose only to adventure with our Lord and Savior.
Sunday, January 11, 2015
Tuesday, January 6, 2015
How I became a Missionary: Following my Gut and God's Confirmation
I never planned on being a missionary. I mean until the last few years when I met a few real live ones, I didn't even think they came from real normal people. I figured God just kept some special ones on reserve like He used to with the Levites. And honestly if you told little freshman in college Kacie that she would have earned her degree to go work as a missionary in another country for free, she would have laughed at you. So how did I end up leaving college as a missionary teacher in the Philippines? Glad you asked. Here's where that story picks up (I started it in my blog post from the day before).
In the beginning of September, I was talking to one of my good camp friends on the phone. As we were discussing our futures that were soon dawning upon us as we both are approaching graduation in May, she mentioned to me that I might want to look into a mission organization called TeachBeyond. A friend of hers had recently gone to Africa through this mission agency. She explained that with my love for adventure, ministry and teaching this could be a cool opportunity. This idea intrigued me at the very least. To humor my friend I agreed to check it out.
I looked at the website but wasn't satisfied with the amount of information given to me. So I just sent a simple email inquiring for more information. When I got an overenthusiastic email back from a lady at the agency the next day, I was overwhelmed. They didn't just want to give me information, they wanted to recruit me right then and there! They even gave me a list of some schools that were looking for math teachers! This might seem really exciting to some, but for the commit-a-phob in me, I needed to back up. It felt like when you first meet someone and they're just too into you. But there was something about this agency that I really did seem to like as I learned more. And as I browsed websites of the potential schools the agency lady sent me, one in particular stood out to me. Faith Academy in the Philippines. For some reason the website just caught my eye and gave me this feeling as I looked at it. It's the only one I kept going back to. And the Philippines reminded me of Haiti, the place I had earlier decided I could live in someday. The Philippines is full of poverty, so I can help in practical ways, and is a tropical island, which is a definite plus for someone like me who can barely survive these cold Michigan winters. Yet I wasn't even sure that I wanted to be a missionary at this point.
So I prayed. I talked to those close to me to see what they thought. Although everyone had somewhat different ways of saying why, every single person that knew me well said that this sounds like exactly the sort of thing that I would want to do. I talked to my pastor. He said it sounded like and amazing opportunity, but gave me other opportunities to look into. So I started doing my research and homework. And prayed more. But as I looked into each opportunity, I noticed there was just not the same feeling when I looked at these agencies and volunteer opportunities. (Looking back I know that feeling was the Holy Spirit.) And realistically I still had my original plan that I could turn to: graduate and get a real job at a school here in the States. But as the weeks passed, I couldn't seem to imagine myself doing anything but working at this little school in the Philippines and teaching with this agency. The normal life I once dreamed of now started to seem like taking the easy way out.
It took a lot of courage to finally fill out my application, but that story is so long and so insane I figured it deserved a post of its own. (Stay tuned in the next few days for that epic adventure.) So let's skip ahead. I interviewed with the TeachBeyond, got accepted, and got my first email of a school expressing interest in an interview a few short days later. Faith Academy in the Philippines. This new email meant things were getting more real every moment. When I first got it, I freaked out. Although I knew how much I had liked this school, I knew that even more I wanted to be where God wanted me.
So I prayed if that's where God wanted me, He would give me peace about it. About 10 minutes after I prayed that, I got a message back from one of the girls on my prayer team saying that she was so excited that I had heard back from Faith. In fact, she said she had been to the Philippines a few years ago on a missions trip and they set up a medical clinic in that exact school and she raved on about how fantastic it was. Talk about confirmation. But God said, "No, child just wait. I have more." That week on Wednesday I was running a worship night that Standing in the Gap put on. I was advised after doing my part and kicking things off to just stand in the back and make sure everything was running smoothly. Yet 20 minutes in, I saw two girls relatively new to our group kind of just looking around. I felt the Holy Spirit nudging me to go talk to them. So I did. Eventually I saw the one girl's Bible which was thick papers and made some lame joke about how there was so much paper in there that she must be adding her own books to the Bible. She laughed, "No, these are just letters from the child I sponsor....in the Philippines." Oh, in the Philippines, interesting. In fact although none of these people knew my prospective plans, the Philippines came up in probably 5 different conversations in the week. And I don't know about you, but foreign countries rarely come up in my everyday conversations, let alone the same one over and over. By the end of the week, I knew that this was all God confirming in my ear that this was exactly where He wanted to be.
So I applied. I interviewed. I got the job. And now I'm on to the next part of the journey, the part that goes so beyond me: support-raising. This is the part that will stretch my faith, increase my need to rely on the body of believers (something Christ intends for all of us), and will really just be a journey of its own. I'd love for you all to join me on this journey so we can work together to expand God's kingdom around the world, learn to trust in God's provision, and learn to give ourselves fully and sacrificially to God's work. I want to learn with you, grow with you, bless you and allow you to bless me. I'll keep updates going through this blog and through monthly newsletters, and would love to contact each of you personally about how you can partner with me in this God-given journey. But mostly, I can't wait to see what the Lord does through us.
Ephesians 2:10 "For we are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do."
In the beginning of September, I was talking to one of my good camp friends on the phone. As we were discussing our futures that were soon dawning upon us as we both are approaching graduation in May, she mentioned to me that I might want to look into a mission organization called TeachBeyond. A friend of hers had recently gone to Africa through this mission agency. She explained that with my love for adventure, ministry and teaching this could be a cool opportunity. This idea intrigued me at the very least. To humor my friend I agreed to check it out.
I looked at the website but wasn't satisfied with the amount of information given to me. So I just sent a simple email inquiring for more information. When I got an overenthusiastic email back from a lady at the agency the next day, I was overwhelmed. They didn't just want to give me information, they wanted to recruit me right then and there! They even gave me a list of some schools that were looking for math teachers! This might seem really exciting to some, but for the commit-a-phob in me, I needed to back up. It felt like when you first meet someone and they're just too into you. But there was something about this agency that I really did seem to like as I learned more. And as I browsed websites of the potential schools the agency lady sent me, one in particular stood out to me. Faith Academy in the Philippines. For some reason the website just caught my eye and gave me this feeling as I looked at it. It's the only one I kept going back to. And the Philippines reminded me of Haiti, the place I had earlier decided I could live in someday. The Philippines is full of poverty, so I can help in practical ways, and is a tropical island, which is a definite plus for someone like me who can barely survive these cold Michigan winters. Yet I wasn't even sure that I wanted to be a missionary at this point.
So I prayed. I talked to those close to me to see what they thought. Although everyone had somewhat different ways of saying why, every single person that knew me well said that this sounds like exactly the sort of thing that I would want to do. I talked to my pastor. He said it sounded like and amazing opportunity, but gave me other opportunities to look into. So I started doing my research and homework. And prayed more. But as I looked into each opportunity, I noticed there was just not the same feeling when I looked at these agencies and volunteer opportunities. (Looking back I know that feeling was the Holy Spirit.) And realistically I still had my original plan that I could turn to: graduate and get a real job at a school here in the States. But as the weeks passed, I couldn't seem to imagine myself doing anything but working at this little school in the Philippines and teaching with this agency. The normal life I once dreamed of now started to seem like taking the easy way out.
It took a lot of courage to finally fill out my application, but that story is so long and so insane I figured it deserved a post of its own. (Stay tuned in the next few days for that epic adventure.) So let's skip ahead. I interviewed with the TeachBeyond, got accepted, and got my first email of a school expressing interest in an interview a few short days later. Faith Academy in the Philippines. This new email meant things were getting more real every moment. When I first got it, I freaked out. Although I knew how much I had liked this school, I knew that even more I wanted to be where God wanted me.
So I prayed if that's where God wanted me, He would give me peace about it. About 10 minutes after I prayed that, I got a message back from one of the girls on my prayer team saying that she was so excited that I had heard back from Faith. In fact, she said she had been to the Philippines a few years ago on a missions trip and they set up a medical clinic in that exact school and she raved on about how fantastic it was. Talk about confirmation. But God said, "No, child just wait. I have more." That week on Wednesday I was running a worship night that Standing in the Gap put on. I was advised after doing my part and kicking things off to just stand in the back and make sure everything was running smoothly. Yet 20 minutes in, I saw two girls relatively new to our group kind of just looking around. I felt the Holy Spirit nudging me to go talk to them. So I did. Eventually I saw the one girl's Bible which was thick papers and made some lame joke about how there was so much paper in there that she must be adding her own books to the Bible. She laughed, "No, these are just letters from the child I sponsor....in the Philippines." Oh, in the Philippines, interesting. In fact although none of these people knew my prospective plans, the Philippines came up in probably 5 different conversations in the week. And I don't know about you, but foreign countries rarely come up in my everyday conversations, let alone the same one over and over. By the end of the week, I knew that this was all God confirming in my ear that this was exactly where He wanted to be.
So I applied. I interviewed. I got the job. And now I'm on to the next part of the journey, the part that goes so beyond me: support-raising. This is the part that will stretch my faith, increase my need to rely on the body of believers (something Christ intends for all of us), and will really just be a journey of its own. I'd love for you all to join me on this journey so we can work together to expand God's kingdom around the world, learn to trust in God's provision, and learn to give ourselves fully and sacrificially to God's work. I want to learn with you, grow with you, bless you and allow you to bless me. I'll keep updates going through this blog and through monthly newsletters, and would love to contact each of you personally about how you can partner with me in this God-given journey. But mostly, I can't wait to see what the Lord does through us.
Ephesians 2:10 "For we are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do."
Monday, January 5, 2015
How I Was Called Into Missions: Seeds Planted Long Ago
First off surprise! I'm going to be a missionary! That's pretty neat!
If you haven't been kept updated and this has come completely out of the blue, my apologies, I've been keeping a lot of things on the DL for a while but I promise over the next few days I will divulge to you in a series of blogs my full story. Because never once did I expect to be a missionary.
Before I get too far let me explain a little about the work God has called me to do. I work with a mission agency called TeachBeyond. TeachBeyond specifically partners teachers with cooperating schools that serve primarily the children of missionaries. For more information on TeachBeyond, check out their website at www.teachbeyond.org. TeachBeyond helped partner me with Faith International Academy in Davao City (Philippines). I will be serving there primarily as a high school math teacher. For more information on Faith, check out their website at www.fia.edu.ph. Or instead of visiting those websites, just call/text/message me and I would love to explain things more in detail.
But what I would like to explain in detail is my call, because it's one of those things that has God's hand all over it and I just want to make sure He gets the credit and praise due to Him for the amazing way He has made this calling of mine evident to myself and those around me.
But first I want to take a step back and rewind. Because although I didn't know this until now, this journey really started 3 years ago. Three years ago I accepted a job at Lake Ann Camp as a counselor. At the time, it seemed just like a fun summer gig. I had no idea what I was getting into. I could rave and rant about how that summer forever changed my life and anyone who knew me before that summer and saw me again after that summer could testify to that fact. It was there that I first really fell in love with the Lord, saw how someone could even live out that relationship with Him in a way that goes so beyond Bible studies and Sundays, saw that my life had something to offer, and developed a passion for serving God and those around me. I could speak of that summer forever recounting how God revealed Himself to me and the stories of my precious campers and how each of them shaped my life in little and big ways. Ask me about it. Seriously there's almost nothing I love talking about more than my summers at camp. But there's one story that I had no idea how it impacted and shaped me until now and that's the one I want to share here.
It was week one, my first summer counseling. There was a constant awareness in my head of how much I didn't know, how much I didn't belong in this place with people that knew God so intimately when I felt like a spiritual baby in comparison. But here I was with five high school girls in my cabin. Who needed healing. Who needed love. Who had big dreams for God. One of those girls in particular really inspired me. We'll call her Shannon. Shannon shared with me her dream of going into the field of sports missions, a place where you could teach the principles of the Gospel through training others in sports camps. As she talked about it, my heart pounded with two thoughts. Firstly I sincerely hoped I could learn to love God as much as it was apparent she did and that my dreams for Him would become as big as hers. Secondly, I could use sports (which I love love love) as a way to serve God? Like this is something I could make a job of and explore the world with? That's so cool. Please tell me more. Shannon and I talked about this quite a bit that week and at the end, I told her if it was the Lord's plan, I'd go pave the way for her and someday we could work together at these sport missions camps. But while the idea seemed really neat, there was that reality in the back of my head that that was probably never really going to happen.
But for some reason, the idea has stuck with me for the last 3 years. I'd see Shannon return to camp each summer after and we'd still talk about it. But I knew that I belonged at the school I was at, not only serving in my campus ministry, but also studying to be a teacher. I knew that that position was something that God wanted to use. They were just two realities that seemed so inconsistent to me....until TeachBeyond came into the picture. Now I have the opportunity to put together my talent of teaching with discipling and missions, which I could not be more ecstatic about.
What blows my mind though is that this seed of a dream I never thought of before was planted 3 years before I even heard of TeachBeyond. God knew the time it would take for my heart to grow fond of this idea and how it needed to grow in me. So He put a camper in my cabin who had dreams that would later inspire mine. Because He's God and He does things like that.
But that's not where God quit planting seeds. Flashback to later that year (so 2 and 1/2 years ago) when I went on my first and only mission trip to Haiti. A group of my college friends and I went down over our spring break to help build a church. While we worked really hard each day, each night something happened that fascinated me. We lost electricity. So we'd light lanterns and enjoy telling each other stories, playing card games, and just being together. And anyone who knows me well knows how I hate the fast-paced, technology-consumed American way of life so this new possibility became fascinatingly beautiful to me. That there really did exist somewhere in the world that I could just leave and escape it all. But that wasn't what sold me. The event that sold me that I would someday love to return to Haiti or someplace like it was on the last day as we rode across the countryside in the back of a pickup. It was here that I saw a land 3 years after a tornado, with millions of people still displaced. And I knew that I wanted to go to places like that where I could help people in a physical way as well as teach them (because education is the key to improving any economy). But I had no idea how or if this would come about. But God did.
Now on the verge of being a missionary, I look back and smile at how God started planting seeds long before I had any interest in an idea like working at a school in the Philippines as a missionary. And without the planting of these little seeds, I would never have jumped on board with this new idea. But God slowly but surely tugged at my heart and planted ideas and dreams in my mind that were so unlike my own. I think that maybe those are the ideas and dreams that we need to pay extra special attention to. And what amazes me is how God starts a process in us long before we even know He's up to anything. Think of where you're at right now. What has God done to bring you to that point? Or how might He be planting seeds in your life now for ways in which He wants to use you?
If you haven't been kept updated and this has come completely out of the blue, my apologies, I've been keeping a lot of things on the DL for a while but I promise over the next few days I will divulge to you in a series of blogs my full story. Because never once did I expect to be a missionary.
Before I get too far let me explain a little about the work God has called me to do. I work with a mission agency called TeachBeyond. TeachBeyond specifically partners teachers with cooperating schools that serve primarily the children of missionaries. For more information on TeachBeyond, check out their website at www.teachbeyond.org. TeachBeyond helped partner me with Faith International Academy in Davao City (Philippines). I will be serving there primarily as a high school math teacher. For more information on Faith, check out their website at www.fia.edu.ph. Or instead of visiting those websites, just call/text/message me and I would love to explain things more in detail.
But what I would like to explain in detail is my call, because it's one of those things that has God's hand all over it and I just want to make sure He gets the credit and praise due to Him for the amazing way He has made this calling of mine evident to myself and those around me.
But first I want to take a step back and rewind. Because although I didn't know this until now, this journey really started 3 years ago. Three years ago I accepted a job at Lake Ann Camp as a counselor. At the time, it seemed just like a fun summer gig. I had no idea what I was getting into. I could rave and rant about how that summer forever changed my life and anyone who knew me before that summer and saw me again after that summer could testify to that fact. It was there that I first really fell in love with the Lord, saw how someone could even live out that relationship with Him in a way that goes so beyond Bible studies and Sundays, saw that my life had something to offer, and developed a passion for serving God and those around me. I could speak of that summer forever recounting how God revealed Himself to me and the stories of my precious campers and how each of them shaped my life in little and big ways. Ask me about it. Seriously there's almost nothing I love talking about more than my summers at camp. But there's one story that I had no idea how it impacted and shaped me until now and that's the one I want to share here.
It was week one, my first summer counseling. There was a constant awareness in my head of how much I didn't know, how much I didn't belong in this place with people that knew God so intimately when I felt like a spiritual baby in comparison. But here I was with five high school girls in my cabin. Who needed healing. Who needed love. Who had big dreams for God. One of those girls in particular really inspired me. We'll call her Shannon. Shannon shared with me her dream of going into the field of sports missions, a place where you could teach the principles of the Gospel through training others in sports camps. As she talked about it, my heart pounded with two thoughts. Firstly I sincerely hoped I could learn to love God as much as it was apparent she did and that my dreams for Him would become as big as hers. Secondly, I could use sports (which I love love love) as a way to serve God? Like this is something I could make a job of and explore the world with? That's so cool. Please tell me more. Shannon and I talked about this quite a bit that week and at the end, I told her if it was the Lord's plan, I'd go pave the way for her and someday we could work together at these sport missions camps. But while the idea seemed really neat, there was that reality in the back of my head that that was probably never really going to happen.
But for some reason, the idea has stuck with me for the last 3 years. I'd see Shannon return to camp each summer after and we'd still talk about it. But I knew that I belonged at the school I was at, not only serving in my campus ministry, but also studying to be a teacher. I knew that that position was something that God wanted to use. They were just two realities that seemed so inconsistent to me....until TeachBeyond came into the picture. Now I have the opportunity to put together my talent of teaching with discipling and missions, which I could not be more ecstatic about.
What blows my mind though is that this seed of a dream I never thought of before was planted 3 years before I even heard of TeachBeyond. God knew the time it would take for my heart to grow fond of this idea and how it needed to grow in me. So He put a camper in my cabin who had dreams that would later inspire mine. Because He's God and He does things like that.
But that's not where God quit planting seeds. Flashback to later that year (so 2 and 1/2 years ago) when I went on my first and only mission trip to Haiti. A group of my college friends and I went down over our spring break to help build a church. While we worked really hard each day, each night something happened that fascinated me. We lost electricity. So we'd light lanterns and enjoy telling each other stories, playing card games, and just being together. And anyone who knows me well knows how I hate the fast-paced, technology-consumed American way of life so this new possibility became fascinatingly beautiful to me. That there really did exist somewhere in the world that I could just leave and escape it all. But that wasn't what sold me. The event that sold me that I would someday love to return to Haiti or someplace like it was on the last day as we rode across the countryside in the back of a pickup. It was here that I saw a land 3 years after a tornado, with millions of people still displaced. And I knew that I wanted to go to places like that where I could help people in a physical way as well as teach them (because education is the key to improving any economy). But I had no idea how or if this would come about. But God did.
Now on the verge of being a missionary, I look back and smile at how God started planting seeds long before I had any interest in an idea like working at a school in the Philippines as a missionary. And without the planting of these little seeds, I would never have jumped on board with this new idea. But God slowly but surely tugged at my heart and planted ideas and dreams in my mind that were so unlike my own. I think that maybe those are the ideas and dreams that we need to pay extra special attention to. And what amazes me is how God starts a process in us long before we even know He's up to anything. Think of where you're at right now. What has God done to bring you to that point? Or how might He be planting seeds in your life now for ways in which He wants to use you?
Wednesday, December 24, 2014
Christ Came
This Christmas season, one fact has been severely blowing my mind more than it ever has before. This fact is simple. Christ came. Christ, the God of the Universe, the Alpha and Omega, the Holy One, the Ancient One of Israel, He put aside His right to rule, His authority, His heavenly home, His well-deserved glory so He could be with us. So He could be one of us. So He could be like us.
Now anyone who has spent enough time in church is like, "Yeah. How have you not known that before?" And it's not that I haven't known this fact. It's just at this point, it has a new comfort to me. That Jesus knows what it's like to be me. Psalm 139 tells us how intimately God knows us. He counts how many times we sit and rise, He knows what we're going to say before we say it, He knows every day we're ever going to live. He knows everything! But the fact that Jesus would say, "Dad I want to go and know what it's like to be them" brings a whole new level of understanding to the equation. God doesn't just know me, He gave up His righteousness to understand what it's like to be me.
This is especially comforting to me now. I'm on the edge of big life-changing decisions. I'm in this weird abyss between my life as a college student and my life as an adult. And sometimes it's hard to find someone who knows exactly how I feel and what's going on. But Jesus does. Jesus transitioned from being a carpenter to full-time ministry in His thirties. He understands transitions. He understands stepping out into the abyss and just trusting God in that. He probably understands how scary that can be. And Jesus knew going into that ministry how rejection from some was inevitable, just as I ponder how not all will always agree with my decisions about my life. So when I'm feeling alone, when I'm lonely and fearful, when I need strength and courage to trust God more, I can lean into the fact that Jesus understands.
And it's not just with these things in my life that Christ can relate. For instance, Joseph, the Earthly father of Jesus, doesn't show up much after the whole Christmas nativity stuff which churches and devotional books focus on ferociously at this time of year. So where is Joseph? Scholars theorize that Joseph either died early in Jesus's life or left them. So if you're struggling with the feelings of loss or abandonment, Jesus probably did too. He gets it.
If Jesus really wanted to, He could have came, lived a cozy but still perfect life on earth with few hardships, and still died as an acceptable sacrifice for our sins. But that's not what He chose. He wanted to walk in our shoes, to learn to relate and understand us better.
So Christ came. He was born a baby completely dependent on others to take care of Him. He grew up and went through awkward adolescent years, zits and all. He worked a secular job and glorified God in that. And then He made that tough transition to give up that security for public ministry where He was hated and mocked. But despite that, He still chose to die for our sins. So wherever you're at in life, Jesus has probably been there and He understands. This is one of the reasons this Christmas that I'm so thankful that little baby Jesus would come to the Earth and experience life like I do. Because I know that He gets me, and it's beautiful to be understood by my Savior.
Now anyone who has spent enough time in church is like, "Yeah. How have you not known that before?" And it's not that I haven't known this fact. It's just at this point, it has a new comfort to me. That Jesus knows what it's like to be me. Psalm 139 tells us how intimately God knows us. He counts how many times we sit and rise, He knows what we're going to say before we say it, He knows every day we're ever going to live. He knows everything! But the fact that Jesus would say, "Dad I want to go and know what it's like to be them" brings a whole new level of understanding to the equation. God doesn't just know me, He gave up His righteousness to understand what it's like to be me.
This is especially comforting to me now. I'm on the edge of big life-changing decisions. I'm in this weird abyss between my life as a college student and my life as an adult. And sometimes it's hard to find someone who knows exactly how I feel and what's going on. But Jesus does. Jesus transitioned from being a carpenter to full-time ministry in His thirties. He understands transitions. He understands stepping out into the abyss and just trusting God in that. He probably understands how scary that can be. And Jesus knew going into that ministry how rejection from some was inevitable, just as I ponder how not all will always agree with my decisions about my life. So when I'm feeling alone, when I'm lonely and fearful, when I need strength and courage to trust God more, I can lean into the fact that Jesus understands.
And it's not just with these things in my life that Christ can relate. For instance, Joseph, the Earthly father of Jesus, doesn't show up much after the whole Christmas nativity stuff which churches and devotional books focus on ferociously at this time of year. So where is Joseph? Scholars theorize that Joseph either died early in Jesus's life or left them. So if you're struggling with the feelings of loss or abandonment, Jesus probably did too. He gets it.
If Jesus really wanted to, He could have came, lived a cozy but still perfect life on earth with few hardships, and still died as an acceptable sacrifice for our sins. But that's not what He chose. He wanted to walk in our shoes, to learn to relate and understand us better.
So Christ came. He was born a baby completely dependent on others to take care of Him. He grew up and went through awkward adolescent years, zits and all. He worked a secular job and glorified God in that. And then He made that tough transition to give up that security for public ministry where He was hated and mocked. But despite that, He still chose to die for our sins. So wherever you're at in life, Jesus has probably been there and He understands. This is one of the reasons this Christmas that I'm so thankful that little baby Jesus would come to the Earth and experience life like I do. Because I know that He gets me, and it's beautiful to be understood by my Savior.
Wednesday, November 5, 2014
To die is gain?
The other night, I went night geocaching with some friends. It was rather late and we were walking through a wooded area that was not well lit up. Early in our excursion, we saw a light coming towards us. Yet we couldn't see the source and that as you might imagine was terrifying. It wasn't until this light past us, that we saw it was just a man innocently running by. For the rest of the time however, my friends were especially on edge as the woods had a new eerie feeling and the idea that we weren't alone seemed to lie around every corner.
During this time, I was having a conversation with one of the girls about being a fighter vs. being a flighter. I told her if we met a scary murderer in the woods, the rest of them should just run and I would fight him off for us. Some of this comes from me thinking I'm tougher than I really am, some of it is just the fact in my very core I'm a protector, but as we were talking another interesting realization occurred to me. Part of it is that dying doesn't frighten me. I no longer believe dying is the bad thing that I once thought it to be.
This of course sparked an interesting conversation between my friend and I starting with the question, "So do you want to die?" (I'm sure that some of this question lies behind a concern that maybe me saying that death wasn't so bad meant I was slightly suicidal which I promise I'm not.) And it has taken me a really long time to get to answer like this but it truly is yes and no. But a guy named Paul puts my thoughts on the issue in much better words than I do:
"For me to live is Christ and to die is gain. If I am to go on living in the body, this will mean fruitful labor for me. Yet what shall I choose? I do not know! I am torn between the two: I desire to depart and be with Christ, which is better by far; but it is more necessary for you that I remain in the body." (Philippians 1:21-24)
When I first ran into these words and gave them serious consideration, I was under the impression that this Paul guy probably just had a sucky life. Because if his life was even remotely good, why in the world would he want to die? And I knew this must be a somewhat godly attitude at least by its mere presence in the Bible, but getting to a place that I thought that death would be a good thing just seemed totally foreign and out of reach to me. And I think that's how most Christians feel about verses like this. But as our love for Christs grows in us my friends that's not how it should be. Let me explain some of my thoughts that led to this transformation of attitude.
One of the most common arguments on why we don't want to die is more of a "not yet" excuse on our parts. Such as "I don't want to die because I want to finish college/get married/have kids/reach my career goal/fill in your own blank first." This is the "there's more to life that I want to experience" philosophy. And you know what, there's more to life that I want to experience as well. But it doesn't actually matter to me if I get to experience it or die first. Because if these experiences are really good things, why would death separate me from them? Would my good and loving God really let me get to heaven and take away from me good things? Or to use the words of Paul again, "He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all-how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things?" (Romans 8:32). This promise is surely not just for life, but tenfold more in heaven! God is bringing in a new heaven and a new earth and behold it will be better! "For the creation was subjected to frustration...in hope that the creation itself will be liberated from its bondage to decay and brought into the glorious freedom of the children of God." (Romans 8:20-21). God's not destroying and taking away the awesome beauty of the things He created that we enjoy on Earth, but He's purifying them and making them better for us! Sunsets? There but better. The tropical islands I've always wanted to go to? There but better. Puppies? Try there but on steroids with their love and playfulness. God gives good things my friends, He doesn't take them away! So why wouldn't death be better?
On top of that though, there is such an advantage to death that we, as Christians, will never have in life. It's the intimacy we will get to have with seeing and walking with Christ face to face. Imagine you were going away on a trip and you're married or have a significant other and they can't go. During this trip, you can talk to them on the phone, you can write letters, but it's just not the same. Your heart longs to be with them face to face, to be held by them, to be able to look into their eyes and see that love they have for you. Shouldn't your heart also long to be in the presence in Your Savior and Love in that way? Mine does. It took a lot of discovering in my heart of hearts of God's intimate love and passion for me to get my heart there, but some days I just find my heart longing to have that face to face time, snuggling with Jesus. I can't wait until I can be with Him like that. To take walks with Him. To be able to make Him dinner and enjoy His company over that meal. To stargaze with Him as He shows me the galaxies and tells me the names of the stars. To just be with Him. My heart longs for this so much, doesn't anyone else's?
Additionally, it will be so good to finally be done with sin. To have that bondage broken once and forever. Because on Earth, I am so aware of how I mess up. Of how I struggle. And I'm so sick of doing things that are displeasing to God but I often can't help myself. And on this side of heaven, we'll all struggle. But Jesus promises to take those who love Him and perfect them. In Revelation 21, Jesus leaves us with the promise "Behold I am making all things new!" and He tells us of a place where "There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away." Deep down in my heart of hearts, I long for this place, this perfection and I know that in this world I am incapable of achieving it. But I know in the next world, Jesus is giving that to me as a gift. And I find myself growing impatient some days as I wait to receive it.
One thing does make me sad to die though. It's all the people that I know won't be in heaven with me. It's the friends I hold so dearly, but don't know Christ as their Savior. That's why as Paul said being here needs to be fruitful labor to me. Because while I'm here, I need to do everything I can to change that. And some days, I suck at that but when I think of that last day that will be the only thing I would have wished I had the chance to do in life before I was gone. To reach down and grab more people to take with me on that journey to be with my Lord. And if anyone else feels this way, go do something about it. Today I am and I pray that until death I will.
During this time, I was having a conversation with one of the girls about being a fighter vs. being a flighter. I told her if we met a scary murderer in the woods, the rest of them should just run and I would fight him off for us. Some of this comes from me thinking I'm tougher than I really am, some of it is just the fact in my very core I'm a protector, but as we were talking another interesting realization occurred to me. Part of it is that dying doesn't frighten me. I no longer believe dying is the bad thing that I once thought it to be.
This of course sparked an interesting conversation between my friend and I starting with the question, "So do you want to die?" (I'm sure that some of this question lies behind a concern that maybe me saying that death wasn't so bad meant I was slightly suicidal which I promise I'm not.) And it has taken me a really long time to get to answer like this but it truly is yes and no. But a guy named Paul puts my thoughts on the issue in much better words than I do:
"For me to live is Christ and to die is gain. If I am to go on living in the body, this will mean fruitful labor for me. Yet what shall I choose? I do not know! I am torn between the two: I desire to depart and be with Christ, which is better by far; but it is more necessary for you that I remain in the body." (Philippians 1:21-24)
When I first ran into these words and gave them serious consideration, I was under the impression that this Paul guy probably just had a sucky life. Because if his life was even remotely good, why in the world would he want to die? And I knew this must be a somewhat godly attitude at least by its mere presence in the Bible, but getting to a place that I thought that death would be a good thing just seemed totally foreign and out of reach to me. And I think that's how most Christians feel about verses like this. But as our love for Christs grows in us my friends that's not how it should be. Let me explain some of my thoughts that led to this transformation of attitude.
One of the most common arguments on why we don't want to die is more of a "not yet" excuse on our parts. Such as "I don't want to die because I want to finish college/get married/have kids/reach my career goal/fill in your own blank first." This is the "there's more to life that I want to experience" philosophy. And you know what, there's more to life that I want to experience as well. But it doesn't actually matter to me if I get to experience it or die first. Because if these experiences are really good things, why would death separate me from them? Would my good and loving God really let me get to heaven and take away from me good things? Or to use the words of Paul again, "He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all-how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things?" (Romans 8:32). This promise is surely not just for life, but tenfold more in heaven! God is bringing in a new heaven and a new earth and behold it will be better! "For the creation was subjected to frustration...in hope that the creation itself will be liberated from its bondage to decay and brought into the glorious freedom of the children of God." (Romans 8:20-21). God's not destroying and taking away the awesome beauty of the things He created that we enjoy on Earth, but He's purifying them and making them better for us! Sunsets? There but better. The tropical islands I've always wanted to go to? There but better. Puppies? Try there but on steroids with their love and playfulness. God gives good things my friends, He doesn't take them away! So why wouldn't death be better?
On top of that though, there is such an advantage to death that we, as Christians, will never have in life. It's the intimacy we will get to have with seeing and walking with Christ face to face. Imagine you were going away on a trip and you're married or have a significant other and they can't go. During this trip, you can talk to them on the phone, you can write letters, but it's just not the same. Your heart longs to be with them face to face, to be held by them, to be able to look into their eyes and see that love they have for you. Shouldn't your heart also long to be in the presence in Your Savior and Love in that way? Mine does. It took a lot of discovering in my heart of hearts of God's intimate love and passion for me to get my heart there, but some days I just find my heart longing to have that face to face time, snuggling with Jesus. I can't wait until I can be with Him like that. To take walks with Him. To be able to make Him dinner and enjoy His company over that meal. To stargaze with Him as He shows me the galaxies and tells me the names of the stars. To just be with Him. My heart longs for this so much, doesn't anyone else's?
Additionally, it will be so good to finally be done with sin. To have that bondage broken once and forever. Because on Earth, I am so aware of how I mess up. Of how I struggle. And I'm so sick of doing things that are displeasing to God but I often can't help myself. And on this side of heaven, we'll all struggle. But Jesus promises to take those who love Him and perfect them. In Revelation 21, Jesus leaves us with the promise "Behold I am making all things new!" and He tells us of a place where "There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away." Deep down in my heart of hearts, I long for this place, this perfection and I know that in this world I am incapable of achieving it. But I know in the next world, Jesus is giving that to me as a gift. And I find myself growing impatient some days as I wait to receive it.
One thing does make me sad to die though. It's all the people that I know won't be in heaven with me. It's the friends I hold so dearly, but don't know Christ as their Savior. That's why as Paul said being here needs to be fruitful labor to me. Because while I'm here, I need to do everything I can to change that. And some days, I suck at that but when I think of that last day that will be the only thing I would have wished I had the chance to do in life before I was gone. To reach down and grab more people to take with me on that journey to be with my Lord. And if anyone else feels this way, go do something about it. Today I am and I pray that until death I will.
Wednesday, September 24, 2014
Fall 7 times, Get back up 8
This morning I woke up and gave myself a pep talk. At first I might not have wanted the pep talk but I knew that that precisely was a reason to give myself one. It went a little something like this:
"Leneway, it's a new day. Yesterday, that's in the past. Yesterday does not define you. Yesterday does not have that privilege. Maybe yesterday you didn't live up to Christ's perfect standard. But today is a new day to pick yourself up and have a new shot at living for Him. Because yesterday doesn't define you; Christ defines you."
I know I'm not the only one who needs a pep talk like this. As I talked to a friend yesterday, we were talking about making camp decisions and how if they often don't stick at first people give up defeated. Campers, I know that not all of you went home and lived out the decisions you made for Christ. I know you haven't given up that sin, haven't witnessed to those friends you said you would, haven't stayed in the Bible as much as you said you would....my little friends, I know. And to the rest of my friends/fellow counselors/classmates/whoever, I know that our journey to follow Christ is often laden with the same bumps and barriers. The question is never have we lived up to the standard yesterday, but what are you gonna do with it today?
Romans 8:1-2 became my battle cry this morning: "Therefore there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus because through Christ Jesus the law of the spirit of life has set me free from the law of sin and death." My encouragement is for you, my friends, to memorize this verse and make it your battle cry to. So when regret, shame, guilt, feelings of unworthiness based on your past, whatever it might be, comes creeping in from your past you can now defend yourself. I mean God's Word is a sword after all (Ephesians 6:17), so let's start using it to fight the lies. And when the Bible says I'm not condemned, I'm going to chose to believe it. Condemned means to be sentenced to punishment or having been expressed disapproval in. And God does neither for those who are in Christ. Therefore no matter how bad you've messed up yesterday, God's not disappointed in you. Because of what Christ did you have peace with God (Romans 5:1), and there's nothing you can do to change that. God doesn't concern Himself with how you responded to Him in the past, He's set you free from sin and death. It's got no hold on you. What God is concerned with is how are you going to respond to Him today.
Proverbs 24:16 "For though the righteous falls seven times, they get back up again."
God knows we're going to fail. What defines us, what truly matters is if we pick ourselves up after that or just lay there on the ground defeated. I for one will refuse to lie there defeated by sin, by my inadequacies, by all the ways I would consider myself a disappointment. I invite you to do the same.
So where do you need to pick yourself up? Is it praying more, reading the Bible more, stopping that sin or addiction, being a good witness to your friends, or (fill in your own blank)? Don't let the past discourage you, don't let it hold you down. For Christ died so that sin and death could no longer have that kind of hold on you. Today you have the choice and the freedom to pick yourself back up, shake off the dust, and start living the life Christ called you to. This is your invitation to do just that.
"Leneway, it's a new day. Yesterday, that's in the past. Yesterday does not define you. Yesterday does not have that privilege. Maybe yesterday you didn't live up to Christ's perfect standard. But today is a new day to pick yourself up and have a new shot at living for Him. Because yesterday doesn't define you; Christ defines you."
I know I'm not the only one who needs a pep talk like this. As I talked to a friend yesterday, we were talking about making camp decisions and how if they often don't stick at first people give up defeated. Campers, I know that not all of you went home and lived out the decisions you made for Christ. I know you haven't given up that sin, haven't witnessed to those friends you said you would, haven't stayed in the Bible as much as you said you would....my little friends, I know. And to the rest of my friends/fellow counselors/classmates/whoever, I know that our journey to follow Christ is often laden with the same bumps and barriers. The question is never have we lived up to the standard yesterday, but what are you gonna do with it today?
Romans 8:1-2 became my battle cry this morning: "Therefore there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus because through Christ Jesus the law of the spirit of life has set me free from the law of sin and death." My encouragement is for you, my friends, to memorize this verse and make it your battle cry to. So when regret, shame, guilt, feelings of unworthiness based on your past, whatever it might be, comes creeping in from your past you can now defend yourself. I mean God's Word is a sword after all (Ephesians 6:17), so let's start using it to fight the lies. And when the Bible says I'm not condemned, I'm going to chose to believe it. Condemned means to be sentenced to punishment or having been expressed disapproval in. And God does neither for those who are in Christ. Therefore no matter how bad you've messed up yesterday, God's not disappointed in you. Because of what Christ did you have peace with God (Romans 5:1), and there's nothing you can do to change that. God doesn't concern Himself with how you responded to Him in the past, He's set you free from sin and death. It's got no hold on you. What God is concerned with is how are you going to respond to Him today.
Proverbs 24:16 "For though the righteous falls seven times, they get back up again."
God knows we're going to fail. What defines us, what truly matters is if we pick ourselves up after that or just lay there on the ground defeated. I for one will refuse to lie there defeated by sin, by my inadequacies, by all the ways I would consider myself a disappointment. I invite you to do the same.
So where do you need to pick yourself up? Is it praying more, reading the Bible more, stopping that sin or addiction, being a good witness to your friends, or (fill in your own blank)? Don't let the past discourage you, don't let it hold you down. For Christ died so that sin and death could no longer have that kind of hold on you. Today you have the choice and the freedom to pick yourself back up, shake off the dust, and start living the life Christ called you to. This is your invitation to do just that.
Monday, August 18, 2014
What I learned this Summer: Not your Average Invitation
Sometimes the Bible describes heaven as a wedding banquet. The party, the dancing, the food, the celebration-this all has been offered to us through Jesus Christ. And according to John 17:3 where Jesus declares that eternal life is simply knowing God, we can draw the conclusion that for Christians that wedding banquet has already started. The table is set. The feast is prepared before us. All we have to do is choose to partake in this great celebration, in this heavenly meal.
During staff training at Lake Ann, our boss always reminds us of this one thing: You can invite people to eat, you can set the table, put on the fancy tablecloth, light some candles, put on some mood music, make the table as appealing as possible, but you can never force someone to eat. The relevance to us was let's make the Gospel look as appealing as possible but we're never going to force someone to accept it because that's not true transformation. And while that was stated as an almost obvious fact in my brain, there was another layer of understanding that until this summer was completely left out of this metaphor until one day when I had a very fateful talk with a camper, in which I walked away learning more and being challenged more than I think she was.
It was Thursday afternoon and I sat down with one of my campers on the grass for a little life chat. This camper had intrigued me all week with the amount of wisdom she kept sharing with our cabin and even just how evidently real it was that Jesus was her friend. But the thing that made this even more intriguing was that she hadn't been a Christian for very long. If I recall right, she had only known Christ as her Savior for 8 months. Eight short months and it had seemed she already knew God in a way that most of the people growing up in church have yet to achieve. So I had to know what was different. So I asked the question that usually gets to the bottom of everything, "What's your story?" She shared much with me but to summarize it in four words: the struggle was real. If there was a God, her life did not look like He loved her. But more than likely He didn't exist. He couldn't. Not the way life was going. Through a series of events she ended up at a church, and to make a long story short she was confronted with this invitation: "Taste and see that the Lord is good." (Psalm 34:8). The challenge: God invites us to come, taste and see that He is good. He invites us to just try it out. If after giving Christianity the kind of all-in try that it necessitates, we don't see that the Lord is good, we're allowed to walk away. What could there possibly be to lose?
So this camper tried it. She committed to living for some period of time as if everything in the Bible were true, as if Jesus were as real as you and me, and as if God loved her and wanted to be an integral part of her life. After a few weeks although her circumstances had not made some drastic change for the better, she had indeed tasted and seen that the Lord is good! Externally life might not have changed, but internally this Jesus fellow was changing everything! She had hope, joy, peace, and knew a love of which she had only heard of before. And just like tasting a fine food that after a bite becomes your new favorite, she was now hooked.
This "taste and see" invitation is the very first invitation that the Lord gives us in our walk with Him. It is not the one that requires of us to "go make disciples", to "pick up our cross and follow him", to "live a life worthy of the calling you've received", but first and foremost to "taste and see that the Lord is good". Because all of these other things are responses of experiencing the goodness of God. Until I know that God has my best interests at heart, He loves me and is a good Father, the idea of committing to His commands is sheer ridiculousness. But once I've seen that He is good, I desire to commit all my ways to Him like a small child who wants at all costs to please their loving parent.
This realization changed everything about how I shared the Gospel this summer and about how I thought of combating unbelief. In my natural state, I'm all about logic. I want to out-think those around me, wow them with facts, and beat their unbelief in some sort of logical game. Instead of curing from the inside-out, I like to put band-aids of knowledge on the wounds of unbelief. As if with enough facts, reasons, and cunning arguments I can win the world to a faith in Christ. But as I sat in the trenches dealing with the unbelief in many of my girls this summer, I was reminded of the cry to "taste and see that the Lord is good". I often ended those conversations with statements along these lines, "Look I can try to persuade you of God's reality with facts, verses, and all kinds of information, but apart from God moving they're useless. So instead take up God's invitation to taste and see that He is good, give Christianity a whole-hearted try holding nothing back from God for the next month and if God hasn't shown you that He is good during that time then walk away. In the meantime, I'll be praying that God reveals to you that He is in fact present and good." Because there really is nothing we as Christians can say that will convince anyone of God's existence on its own. It is only when God shows up and moves that His reality is confirmed in the lives of those in the world.
I just want to emphasize again the importance of this all-in approach to the try. We haven't really tasted food until we've committed to putting it in our mouth. Likewise, although on rare circumstance God may just show up, God wants that commitment to go all in before He shows us He is good. His promise "You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart." (Jeremiah 29:13). If that's the promise than there will never be a time when we truly taste and find that God's not good. He's always desiring to be found by us, and when we find Him, it's impossible to miss His goodness.
So for my Christian and non-Christian alike: Maybe you have yet to taste and see that God is good. I would encourage you to try this all in living, fully committing yourself to live as if this God and Bible thing were the real deal for the next month. If at the end of this "ALL-IN" approach to Christianity, you have yet to see that God is good, then walk away. What have you got to lose? After all, you'll either see that God is good and be blessed in that or see that God is not good once and for all and be able to walk away. Seems like trying it is the only way you'll really discover either way.
For my Christian friends that have tasted and seen that the Lord is good, I leave you with two calls. First remember that we are not to try to force people into following Jesus but our invitation is to "taste and see that the Lord is good", then trust that the Lord is completely capable to show His goodness to those around Him. After the invitation to "taste and see", our job becomes one of prayer not of trying to force people into Jesus. The second invitation is from Jesus's homie Peter: "Like newborn infants, long for the pure spiritual milk, that by it you may grow up into salvation— if indeed you have tasted that the Lord is good." (1st Peter 2:2-3). Peter calls us to "grow up in our salvation" after. So if you know God is good, don't stay spiritual babies but grow up into that!
During staff training at Lake Ann, our boss always reminds us of this one thing: You can invite people to eat, you can set the table, put on the fancy tablecloth, light some candles, put on some mood music, make the table as appealing as possible, but you can never force someone to eat. The relevance to us was let's make the Gospel look as appealing as possible but we're never going to force someone to accept it because that's not true transformation. And while that was stated as an almost obvious fact in my brain, there was another layer of understanding that until this summer was completely left out of this metaphor until one day when I had a very fateful talk with a camper, in which I walked away learning more and being challenged more than I think she was.
It was Thursday afternoon and I sat down with one of my campers on the grass for a little life chat. This camper had intrigued me all week with the amount of wisdom she kept sharing with our cabin and even just how evidently real it was that Jesus was her friend. But the thing that made this even more intriguing was that she hadn't been a Christian for very long. If I recall right, she had only known Christ as her Savior for 8 months. Eight short months and it had seemed she already knew God in a way that most of the people growing up in church have yet to achieve. So I had to know what was different. So I asked the question that usually gets to the bottom of everything, "What's your story?" She shared much with me but to summarize it in four words: the struggle was real. If there was a God, her life did not look like He loved her. But more than likely He didn't exist. He couldn't. Not the way life was going. Through a series of events she ended up at a church, and to make a long story short she was confronted with this invitation: "Taste and see that the Lord is good." (Psalm 34:8). The challenge: God invites us to come, taste and see that He is good. He invites us to just try it out. If after giving Christianity the kind of all-in try that it necessitates, we don't see that the Lord is good, we're allowed to walk away. What could there possibly be to lose?
So this camper tried it. She committed to living for some period of time as if everything in the Bible were true, as if Jesus were as real as you and me, and as if God loved her and wanted to be an integral part of her life. After a few weeks although her circumstances had not made some drastic change for the better, she had indeed tasted and seen that the Lord is good! Externally life might not have changed, but internally this Jesus fellow was changing everything! She had hope, joy, peace, and knew a love of which she had only heard of before. And just like tasting a fine food that after a bite becomes your new favorite, she was now hooked.
This "taste and see" invitation is the very first invitation that the Lord gives us in our walk with Him. It is not the one that requires of us to "go make disciples", to "pick up our cross and follow him", to "live a life worthy of the calling you've received", but first and foremost to "taste and see that the Lord is good". Because all of these other things are responses of experiencing the goodness of God. Until I know that God has my best interests at heart, He loves me and is a good Father, the idea of committing to His commands is sheer ridiculousness. But once I've seen that He is good, I desire to commit all my ways to Him like a small child who wants at all costs to please their loving parent.
This realization changed everything about how I shared the Gospel this summer and about how I thought of combating unbelief. In my natural state, I'm all about logic. I want to out-think those around me, wow them with facts, and beat their unbelief in some sort of logical game. Instead of curing from the inside-out, I like to put band-aids of knowledge on the wounds of unbelief. As if with enough facts, reasons, and cunning arguments I can win the world to a faith in Christ. But as I sat in the trenches dealing with the unbelief in many of my girls this summer, I was reminded of the cry to "taste and see that the Lord is good". I often ended those conversations with statements along these lines, "Look I can try to persuade you of God's reality with facts, verses, and all kinds of information, but apart from God moving they're useless. So instead take up God's invitation to taste and see that He is good, give Christianity a whole-hearted try holding nothing back from God for the next month and if God hasn't shown you that He is good during that time then walk away. In the meantime, I'll be praying that God reveals to you that He is in fact present and good." Because there really is nothing we as Christians can say that will convince anyone of God's existence on its own. It is only when God shows up and moves that His reality is confirmed in the lives of those in the world.
I just want to emphasize again the importance of this all-in approach to the try. We haven't really tasted food until we've committed to putting it in our mouth. Likewise, although on rare circumstance God may just show up, God wants that commitment to go all in before He shows us He is good. His promise "You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart." (Jeremiah 29:13). If that's the promise than there will never be a time when we truly taste and find that God's not good. He's always desiring to be found by us, and when we find Him, it's impossible to miss His goodness.
So for my Christian and non-Christian alike: Maybe you have yet to taste and see that God is good. I would encourage you to try this all in living, fully committing yourself to live as if this God and Bible thing were the real deal for the next month. If at the end of this "ALL-IN" approach to Christianity, you have yet to see that God is good, then walk away. What have you got to lose? After all, you'll either see that God is good and be blessed in that or see that God is not good once and for all and be able to walk away. Seems like trying it is the only way you'll really discover either way.
For my Christian friends that have tasted and seen that the Lord is good, I leave you with two calls. First remember that we are not to try to force people into following Jesus but our invitation is to "taste and see that the Lord is good", then trust that the Lord is completely capable to show His goodness to those around Him. After the invitation to "taste and see", our job becomes one of prayer not of trying to force people into Jesus. The second invitation is from Jesus's homie Peter: "Like newborn infants, long for the pure spiritual milk, that by it you may grow up into salvation— if indeed you have tasted that the Lord is good." (1st Peter 2:2-3). Peter calls us to "grow up in our salvation" after. So if you know God is good, don't stay spiritual babies but grow up into that!
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